The day the Fangirl's took over Middle Earth
by Bex the Bold
Summary: Middle Earth was not prepared for this new evil, the dark lord himself had been defeated by this new power, this *fangirl*!
1. Intro

Shortly after the fellowship had left from Revendalle the Dark Lord Sauron fixed his eye on the ring he herd it's call but could not yet place it's exact whereabouts. The nine wraths were in search of the ring but could not seem to find it, each time the ring slipped from their grasp. It was only a few days after the fellowship had left the realm of the elves that the Great Dark Lord Sauron was about to meet a creature even more powerful than he...

In the land of Mordor the sky was black and lighting was streaked thought the sky. the orcs worked endlessly in the depths of the earth mining and using steel craft to forge weapons. It was then that on the very tower housing Sauron himself that beneath his very firing eye that the air turned. Then slowly opened in a gap then a teen girl came flying out and landed on her face on the top of the tower. Souron looked directly beneath him and watched as the girl picked herself up. If Sauron had eye lids he would have blinked in disbelief. Looking around the girl turned back to the portal and waved her hand at it yelling 'It's ok! You can come though!' Then another girl came flying though and landed on top of the first. Standing up and brushing herself off she had short cropped brown hair which made her look like a man. The only thing making her look feminine was the shirt she wore that was a tight bright pink one that had 'fear me' written on the front. They both then stopped and looked up to see a giant levitating flaming eye ball looking back at them. 

The girl in the pink shirt pointed her black nail polished finger at Sauron and said. "I command you to give me all the power you possess and hand your armies over to me!"

If Sauron had a eye lid he would have blinked in stupidity that such a small mortal child, for she was only a teen youth, would command him so. So he did the next best thing he laughed so hard the foundations of the tower shook.

"How dare you laugh at me!" The girl screamed. "you shall feel my wrath!"

AN-Ok what do you all think I need input, I crave it. And yes I'm aware that I make fun of Sauron's lack of an eye lid a lot, I just personally find it quite humorous. Oh and I know I'm getting names wrong but I don't really have the time and I'm too lazy to look up the correct spelling's right now.


	2. Sauroninaglobe

My little twisted mind: OK just to let all you people know that fist one wasn't a chapter it was an _intro_! It's not supposed to be all fancy and every thing. On another note I'm sorry it's taken so long to get this chapter up, and sorry again for the misspelled words I'm a moron and have a dyslexia so just deal with it. 

Sauron-in-a-Globe

Chapter One

In the land of Mordor the normally charred black sky was bright and sunny, which was quite unusual for Mordor. But much has changed since the new queen of darkness had concord Sauron lord of darkness. The first change was that the great tower was painted a washed out pastel pink while all the other castles and forts (and those that the dark queen had build) were painted a variety of pinks, purples, yellows, greens, and sky blues. The once dark world was now bright and colorful. The orc armies had also changed, when the dark queen had come the orcish armor was thrown aside and they now adorned new armor. Consisting of light purple chain mail, light pink half plate armor, with yellow helmets which had fluffy feathers covering the top and rim of the helmet making it look more like a head dress then a helmet. The half plate armor was adorned with glitter and beads glued onto it with finger paints also each chest plate had two small pompoms glued on either side giving the impression of nipples. All together the newly rearmored orc army looked like a army of transvestites. At first the orc's rebelled agents the new changes but once they were force fed happy pills they just sat on once place staring off into space and drooled a lot. In addition to the orc army the dark queen called forth from her world the dreaded fan girl army. Their numbers were few at fist but then they soon out numbered the entire orc army seven to one. They along with the orc's were the mindless stock troops of the dark queen. While the orc's stared off into their happy place the fan girls though simple minded thinking of only their obsession they were quick to run after deadly elves ignoring the danger of their pointy and painful weapons thinking of only getting some sweet Elvin ass. Fearless (or stupid) as these fan girls were they were clumsy and couldn't form a plan if their lives depended on it, so they used their shear numbers to mob their enemy. 

While the transvestite orc and fan girl army attacked the surrounding lands of Mordor the dark queen sat in her throne room. She would spend hours, days, weeks just poring over maps and statistics to win battles. But now she sat on her dark throne with a smirk on her face. In her hand was a snow globe inside that snow globe was that former dark lord Sauron. He cursed in Mordorish as the dark queen shook the globe causing the glitter in it to stir and stick in his eye.

"Heh heh heh I bet you wish you had an eye lid now huh?" She asked Sauron, as she gave him another whorl and more glitter got in his fiery eye.

Then suddenly the doors of the throne room burst open and a fan girl hassled in fallowed by two orc's clad in their battle/transvestite-bitch-fighting armor who fallowed. The fan girl who's name was Cassie was also the girl who was the first to come thought the portal. The orc on Cassie's left as the leader of the orc's and easily identified because of the big light purple fro wig he wore as a symbol of his statues. With each sep he took the fro swayed being about 4.5 feet in circumference it stick out among the other orc's helmets/head dresses. The three stopped in front of the dark queen.

"Important news!" Cassie screamed.

"Of what?" The dark queen asked, but Cassie just stared at the queen with a blank expression.

"Um... I forgot..." She said blinking.

"Your highness" The orc with the oh-so-fluffy-fro said. " We have news that an alliance of men, elves, dwarves, and even a few hobbits are to attempt to take on your power and challenge you. The armies-"

He tried to go on but was cut off by Cassie screaming. "Yes! That's it I remember Frodo will be there! Oh my little sexy midget will be there. Oh no I have to save him from the fighting I don't want him to get hurt." 

the orc commander and his suburbanite stared at Cassie blinking while the dark queen sighed at her outburst.

"Well then." The dark queen said putting her Sauron-in-a-globe in her gig baggie gothic pants pocket. "We wont want to disappoint them now will we" She then stood up and looked out the window. "Prepare the orc and fan girl army!" she screamed.

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